Tomorrow makes another week of waiting and brings the grand total to 6 months. I realize it is not much of a wait compared to other countries and no matter how long the wait, it will be worth it when we get our baby. However, it's not the length of the wait as much as it is the expectation of normal versus reality. We were given an expectation of 3 to 5 months. As we exited our window we were sorely disappointed. I always plan for things to be a bit worse than I expect b/c it seems to be my luck, but as we have reached these past few weeks our hearts have grown heavier. It has really got to be ridiculous for us and we feel as if we will never get a referral. I know it will happen, to hang in there, that God is in control, all of that- but time marches on and we are left standing still.
On a more positive note today a few things happened that I really enjoyed. I got several records at work that I had been waiting on and excitedly took them to the people who had been waiting on them. As I took them the records I realized there were a couple of people who thought I was not bringing them their paper work, but our referral information. It was too late when I realized what was happening and could see the joy on their faces and their arms come out ready to hug me. Then once I showed them what it was they were still excited but in that odd state of "what to do from here". I felt bad and didn't really know what to say and they also seemed to be fishing for the next move! Even though it was an awkward situation, it was neat to see their excitement and made me feel great that there are so many people pulling for us to get this referral! Our baby is out there and we are going to bring him/her home… I just don’t know WHEN.
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9 comments:
I know how you feel- and I know there is nothing I can say to make it better. So I will say a prayer.
God is faithful.
I understand what you're saying! You can have the head knowledge, but that doesn't change the feelings of frustration and extreme desire to get that call!
I'll pray for peace in the midst of this trying time!
You touched on something that I have been feeling..."expectations are the root of resentment." If we expect to get something in a week, as we get closer to the end of the week... we go crazy... but what if they had said it would take 2 weeks and it came still near the end of that same week, we are pleasantly surprised. Time is the function that we get frustrated with. Adoption is so hard because there is no end date that there is in pregnancy. Once you see your sweet child this wait will fall away. Soon. I know that the only thing that will make you feel better is that call... so I will pray for the call to come and give you peace.
It does seem a bit unfair that the world continues to move and bustle about while you feel like your world has stopped and is standing still.
I am so sorry the wait has been so long. I will continue to keep you all in my prayers.
Rebecca
I know it will happen very soon, very soon and we are all anxiously waiting with you and helping you to bear the weight of the wait.
"Weight of the Wait". Hmmm...I think I feel a post title coming on....
:)
Cindy
I agree - the expectation versus reality is the really hard part. I know people who adopt from china wait for three years for a referral - but they know that up front. That's what the expect. Praying for peace and comfort for you.
Hoping you get your referral. REALLY SOON.
your referral is right around the corner of a precious child who will bring you joy for the rest of your life!! hang in there!
It is certainly the expectation versus reality that is the hard part. With our first adoption we waited 7 weeks for our referral. Yeah, only 7 weeks! But, we had been told it would be 2-4 weeks! So those last 3 weeks were so, so hard! Hang in there, it has to be so soon now!
Thanks for checking in and commenting on my blog even when I was being a horrible blogger. I have been checking your blog frequently too for your referral news. Hoping and praying it comes very soon! I know the wait is hard...
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